I am still deciding on the theme of this post… should this be a rant against people who advise me against overthinking? Or should it be more to the lines of seeking support from people who suffer from a similar condition (yes, that’s what it is!) Or perhaps a justification- discourse majorly covering issues of how you (the over-thinker) are not a perpetrator (as it seems) and instead are a victim to the clutches of this mental condition!
(Too harsh eh..?)
So, I’ve been guilty of this charge for most part of the three decades that I’ve graced this planet (:P) but if you ask me, when and how I developed this habit, I don’t really have a concrete answer.. Was it something that creeped up on the oblivious me? Or was it a defense mechanism to all adverse situations thrown at me? A way to somehow, by hook or crook, just deduce and derive a logical explanation to all whys and hows of Life… Again, I can’t say…
But one thing is clear… by no stretch of imagination is Over-thinking an enjoyable experience. Not for the person who indulges in it, not for their journey to attain peace and contentment and most definitely not for the people who love them… Another obvious truth is that the struggle to get out of this draining, more-often-than-not negative, constant loop is REAL.
It’s mostly the people around you who tell you that you overthink! (yup! it’s true.. you don’t realize that you’re a part of this downward spiral or that even at a sub-conscious level, the mind keeps you engaged in thoughts.. of things not in control, of things that have happened, of things that are yet to happen.. of things relevant and those that are irrelevant… just about EVERYTHING…ALL THE TIME!)
Confession: There have been days that I’ve woken up tired, tired of a night-long marathon of dreams.
They say you should stop… over analyzing, self-sabotaging, self-depreciating or (the plain old) over-thinking.
And in your defense you feel that it’s not something you volunteered to do or enjoy in any way .. it’s just a way of life. (at least I did) There are days you feel intellectually superior to those around and some when you feel particularly down in dumps, wishing you had it simpler, wishing all was easy to let-go..
But that’s the struggle written for you… that’s a challenge God wants you to overcome. And if that’s what He wants, be rest assured, He has equipped you with every weapon to fight it out and make your way through it..
There are a couple of things I try doing (as regularly as this life-long etched habit permits)
- Expressing Gratitude- Somehow I find it easier to be grateful to non-living things (:P) like my house but I do thank God for blessing me (with an underlying reminder that He needs to do it for the rest of my life)
- Breaking the cycle- this happens only when I am conscious of over-thinking. Most of the times I am able to divert my mind but have to admit that some thoughts are far more persuasive than my will-power.
- Try to find something good, anything positive- Again, easier to show the silver lining to others than yourself but the trick is to keep at it. Positivity may not be evident in the heat of that moment but it does show itself if found relentlessly.
- Letting off the steam- I write. Mostly a scribble, a series of complaints and questions, a distasteful concoction of emotions… but it works. It calms me down.
- Accepting- that acceptance is the only right given to you and the sooner you start putting it to practice, the better it is.
- Keep moving- taking baby steps, in whichever direction (but with best intentions) , whatever the result but just keep moving and congratulating yourself for doing that (yes, you need encouragement too)
- Having no expectations- still at the starting point here.. no substantial progress yet 😛
It’s a journey far from it’s end… but a journey I’ve decided to take… God Bless Me!